Weaknesses
by fantasticality
Summary: Tess had no weaknesses, and therefore, no ways for Shane to take advantage of her. But one lost bottle of perfume and a demeaning lie changes it all. A crack-ish Shess. Merry Christmas, Vale!


**_I don't own the perfume, J'adore, nor do I own Camp Rock or anything related to it._**

**This is my very first try at Shess. I intended it to be a drama-ish type of fic but it turned out to be crack. *sigh* I'm hopeless.**

**Dedication: For my very first friend on , valele. Thanks for sticking by my immature ways and being such an awesome friend!**

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Mitchie was a near-perfect girl, Shane had thought. So he often wondered why he hadn't chosen her as a girlfriend when the brunette beauty was already plenty in love with him. Instead, Shane decided on Tess. Something from the very moment he met her intrigued him, the popstar had decided.

When Shane had first laid eyes on Tess, he was instantly mesmerized. Her shining golden blonde hair, her ice blue eyes, her beautiful and defined features, and striking smile, all of them made his stomach churn with desire. He would stare at her through his lustful hazel eyes, just wanting to approach his so-called goddess.

And he did, at one point. He had sauntered up to her, a seductive smirk on his handsome face. Tess had giggled girlishly, responding to all of his advances flirtatiously. Shane thought he had her caught, completely under his will.

He had been wrong.

Shane had tried all sorts of ways to take advantage of her. He had threatened to tell her family of what they had done when Tess wouldn't let him go places (TJ hadn't approved of Shane at the time). She told him that she didn't give a shit what her family thought. He'd told her he wouldn't let her take his Ferrari out when she took away his "educational movies." Tess had retaliated by saying she already had a more expensive Ferrari and liked hers better. When the blonde told her boyfriend she wasn't in the mood for sex, Shane had huffed, stating he wouldn't make love to her for the next year. She had replied, smirking, that she knew he would never last.

Did the girl have any weaknesses?

The man who held the power to break a thousand hearts with one flirtatious smile had incidentally had his heart stolen by a girl with a similar power. Quite frankly, Shane wasn't sure if he wanted it back.

Of course, this didn't stop more arguments from occurring…

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Oh, he was going to get it, Tess raged. He was going to be a pile of dog shit on the road if she didn't get what she wanted.

"Shane, what the hell did you do with my perfume?" Tess screeched, storming down to her incompetent boyfriend.

Said idiot looked lazily towards the irate blonde from his spot on the couch. "Perfume, Tess?" he drawled, cocking up a bushy eyebrow. "You have fifteen different bottles on the dresser. You'll need to be more specific."

"J'adore! My bottle of J'adore, Shane! Where is it?"

He let out a heavy sigh before getting up off the couch to saunter to his girlfriend. "Why would I have that crappy perfume? It's made for women when I am obviously a male."

"You sure about that?" Tess countered, crossing her arms in a huffy manner.

"Then wouldn't that make you a lesbian?"

Cobalt eyes were rolled. Really, couldn't he think of a more witty response? Tess often wondered why she dated him for three years when she preferred men with IQ's higher than their age. Shane's mutters brought her out of her thoughts.

"Of course, I wouldn't mind if she was bi," he mumbled, a perverse glint lighting up his already sparkling hazel eyes. "Then maybe we could form a threesome or something. Sex is getting kind of boring lately with her…"

Oh, no, he did _not_ just go there.

"Sex with me is boring?!" she shrieked, clearly affronted. Who the hell did he think he was talking to? She wasn't Mitchie! Fucking her was an honor!

Shane gave a nonchalant shrug. "Well, sort of. I mean, you're a wonder in bed and all, but the entire routine is getting old."

Getting old? The ass! Him nearly ripping out her hair nearly three times a week was what was getting old! And there wasn't even a routine, she fumed. Begging to get her in bed was more of a necessity on Shane's part. Tess complying with Shane's obnoxious pleads were getting old for her!

"You're one to talk, Shane," she ground out. "Begging is extremely unbecoming of you."

Her boyfriend didn't seem to have heard what she said. "Who would've thought," he mused, "that Tess Tyler was boring in bed. Wait 'til Nate hears."

Tess's eyes widened. She knew that Shane was wrong, and she was a complete thrill in bed. But if other people (namely Caitlyn) caught wind of the news, even if it was a lie, Tess would never hear the end of it!

"No! Don't tell anyone, Shane," she shrieked. "If you do, I won't take away your animal porno or whatever it is ever again!"

"It's not animal porn," he snapped. "And you promise?"

She nodded vigorously.

Giving a smirk, Shane haughtily replied, "Alright, then. I won't tell anyone that sex with you is boring."

Tess flashed him a dazzling smile, thanking him multiple times. She bounced away, an elated expression on her face. It didn't once occur to her that she forgot all about her perfume.

Watching his girlfriend skip away, Shane allowed a small smirk take over his face. Who knew that the way to take advantage of Tess merely blackmail with saying she was boring in bed. Oh, this was gold.

Even if it was a complete and utter lie.

****

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This is my first time writing Shess, so I hope it was okay, Vale. I'm not particularly proud of this fic, seeing as it turned out to be crack when I wanted it to be drama. *laughs sheepishly* But I hope it sufficed.

Reviews are greatly appreciated!


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